When wine was opened

Random senseless morning thinking about interactions with day to day objects. 1. Which came first, the cork or the cork screw? Maybe it was a bunch of wanna be alcoholics staring at a bottle of wine in 1768 wondering how they were going to get drunk. 2. What would be the point of having a screwdriver before you had screws? Maybe to open paint cans or pry open a treasure chest full of gold coins. 3. The infamous red Solo cup and the Dixie cup made for cheap beer and cheap wine, respectively, getting red necks drunk on a daily basis. 4. Canning jars were not meant to preserve food, but rather to show off a collection of mid-summer night fireflies and promote good clean fun for children everywhere. 5. Easy Cheese is just disgusting, as is squeezable yogurt. There are just reasons some things should not be transformed into a squeezable/spray-able form. What's next Easy Beef? Squeeze broccoli? 6. What did people drink coffee from before there were coffee cups? Technically, shouldn't any cup you put coffee in be called a coffee cup? Why are there so many types of cups and glasses? I would have a lot less dishes to wash if all beverages tasted the same in a 16oz tumbler, unfortunately, my brain tells me that wine does indeed taste better in a Riedel glass appropriate for a certain type of wine (see #3). 7. 3D TV, hmmm, I think this is Big Brother trying to lessen the distance in our minds between reality and make believe - the next phase in the master plan of total mind control. One day soon we will all be slaves to the government. 8. The MP3 player, the e-Reader and the smart phone prevent people from having real live conversations in public places. Come ride the PATH train with me if you don't believe me.  Stuff 200 people into a small space and you may get one conversation in a 30 minute period. Everyone is heads down engaged in some sort of media interaction (see #7), not people interaction. And we call ourselves social! 9. Makeup. There is physical beauty in everyone, I just don't get the purpose of painting over this with layers and layers of makeup (I am a sucker for F**k Me Red lipstick, though). 10. Why do we enjoy being scared? Horror movies! Aren't there enough scary things in life that we don't need artificial fear?

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