Adventure time! I rolled out of bed at 6:30, right on time, put on a pot of coffee, did the morning routine and was ready for the day. Until... I realized my camera battery was dead. I had an hour before I was being picked up for my day of exploring, maybe I can get some charge in. At 7:50 in rolls the Land Rover of all Land Rovers from ABC Aruba, we're going offroading! I arrived at the office, signed a waiver (I probably should have read it a little better) and was ready to go. Some quick math here, the Rovers fit 10 people each, 98% of the people gathered were couples, 1% was a group of three ladies, and then there was me to round out the hundred. I figured at least I might get the passenger seat up front since there were 8 in the back. Elijah, the Prophet introduced himself, he would be our guide, and his sidekick (but I cannot remember his name). Wait, we were a group of about 30, and five Rovers, 2 guides doesn't add up. Elijah explained the morning, where we would be going, explained we would be back at the office for lunch and that his drink was the Elijah's Punch because he used to box when he was younger and we should all have one to make us happy for the afternoon shake up. But I was still wondering about the number of vehicles to guides. And then it happened. He asked for three daring volunteers. Ah, there's the other drivers! We were all then instructed to hop in. I grabbed the second in line and hopped in the passenger seat, I get an up front tour. I then learned that Tony, my driver and fellow adventurer was from Brooklyn, well, originally from Greece, but now in Brooklyn. I thought about this... driving in the city versus off roading, my life was in his hands for the next 8 hours. How bad could it be? City drivers tend to be right up on the tailgating concept, this would be my fear, he didn't like to use the brakes. I never truely caught his girlfriends name, but I think it was Christy, I did find out she was from China. The best thing, and worst thing (which I will explain later) is that we were the "rest" and the only three in our Rover, the remaining four were packed with between 6 and 10 people. Buckle up, lets go. First stop, the Natural Bridge. Hmmm, I said, because I knew it had fallen in 2005, most likely due to Hurricane Ivan smacking his tail against the coast in 2004, but Baby Natural Bridge is still there, but probably not for long. The ride there was not too bad, pretty much all paved road, and my Brooklyn driver had increased my confidence level in his ability to keep me alive. Ouch, brain freeze as I write... Dang Summer Dreams, a yummy frozen concoction of 151 Rum, Green Grenadine, Coconut Cream and fresh bananas. We all notices the stacked rocks, but Elijah wouldn't tell us yet their meaning, and on we went. The next stop was... an ostrich farm? Yep, that's right, certainly not indigenous to Aruba, but here none the less. There's a "good luck butt" carving near the entrance, yeah, I rubbed it! We met Herald, the Ostrich farm tour guide and then we met a few Emus. I learned that emu oil is great for joint pain, and they run 25 miles an hour, but don't drink the emu oil, warned Herald, or you will shit at 25 miles an hour! Next we me a few ostrich, they are much taller than me! And I fed them, pictures come after the trip, you must wait. They can run 40 miles an hour, and sustain that speed for an hour, and can kick like hell, so what once was a bear escape plan is now an ostrich escape plan. We then headed off to the gold mines, the terrain became a little more rugged, the bumps a little bigger. Gold, over 3000 pounds of gold was mined from Aruba, and a castle like fort thingy was built with openings to scare the pirates away (you couldn't tell from the pirate ship if there were cannons or not in the openings), although no cannons were ever in the fort, nor was a roof ever put on. It stands today, pretty much as it was the day it was finished. Here we finally learned about the stacked rocks. Ledgend says that the firsherman used to stack rocks to mark a good fishing spot, but then the tourists kicked in, and Aruba loves tourists, so pretty much the entire north shore from the Natural Bridge to the lighthouse has stacks of rocks (pictures to come, it's pretty cool). Of course Elijah had his own story when he told us to go stack rocks, stack 7 rocks, one for each wish, the seventh is your big wish, but before you put the seventh rock on, slip a $20 under the sixth rock, then make your big wish and place the seventh on. Walk away for seven minutes and when you come back, if the $20 is gone, you wish will come true and your tour guide's wish already did! We then went through some pretty serious four wheelin' action and I was holding on for dear life! My drivers girfriend was bouncing and shaking in the back and got a little sick, but after a cool frozen drink from the roadside stand, was feeling a little better. We stopped at the Alto Vista Chapel, the California lighthouse and then headed back to the office for lunch at the Waka Waka where we had Aruba style bbq ribs and according to my drivers girlfriend, rice comparable to that which she would have in Hong Kong (it was pretty tasty). Then there was the not so good strawberry ice cream. We all had some drinks and jumped back in the Rovers for a shake you up afternoon! Our first stop was Baby Beach, and it was a long 45 minute ride, although mostly on paved roads. Baby Beach is hard to get to unless you have your own rental vehicle, the taxis will take you there, but they don't exactly come around to pick you up. There are plenty of tours that will get you there, buut ABC Aruba is the only one that will also take you to the Natural Pool (and a bunch of other places as well!). This beach is waist deep forever and does have a little bit of snorkle action, but the current is a little strong, so without flippers, very tiresome, and we had already had a tiresome day, so I didn't stay out long. Bring extra money if you go, it's two quarters to use the restroom, and no, it's not one quarter for #1 and one for #2 (yes, this was asked by someone). I decided it was time for another Balashi, so for the small fee of $3.00, I had an ice cold beverage and sat down with a couple from Holland. We talked for 10 minutes or so then it was time to go. Fifty kilometers an hour over the desert like landscape, dust flying everywhere (note, don't wear a white shirt, it will not be white when you get back to the hotel). The terrain wasn't too bad, my drivers girlfriend had moved to the front seat, she was right though, it was more intense in the back (possibly since we had an empty Rover, not much weight back there). Next stop, the bat cave, no seriously! It was dark. It smelled like bat dung. We could go in any cave we wanted to, but our guide couldn't promise we would find our way back out. I almost did another Aruba Face Plant, but managed to catch myself. There were spots in the cave where the ceiling had holes up to the surface, really neat how the light poured in. Anyways, time to go for the last stop on our adventure. Holy @*#%, hold on for dear life kind of ride to the Natural Pool. This was serious four wheeling! Up and down volcanic rock and coral, hairpin turns, six inches of clearance to the edge, please stay on the road! For what seemed like hours, my ass was in the air more than it was the seat, but we made it. You could hear all the others in the Rovers screaming, it was like a roller coaster. It was only 88 steps down the rocks once we parked, but 188 steps back up. Basically a pool formed by rocks and coral, the water was crystal clear and swarming with fish. Well worth the bumpy ride. We spent close to an hour there before packing up to end our adventure. In true spirit of Elijah, he made sure we had a bumpy shake you up ride to almost ever place we had been today, but there was always a smooth ride leaving each place. We asked him about this and he was quick to relay that the only way out was the same way we came in. Holy @*#%, hold on for dear life kind of ride leaving the Natural Pool. Going back was a lot bumpier than coming down, I think this was due to over confidence of the drivers, a little faster and trying to aim for the bumpiest of bumps. We made it though! Back at the office, lots of email exchanging goes on before we all get redivided into groups for a smooth ride back to the hotel. What was an eight hour tour was better close to ten hours, and worth every penny - I would do it again, and I'm usually not one for those big group tours, but this one goes down in my book as an excellent adventure and social experience. I arrived back at the hotel close to 7:30, Happy Hour was over but I popped a couple asprin (my ass hurts!!!) and headed down to the bar. A few drinks later and I was in bed by 9:30, exhausted, but had a wonderful time! My new song One Balashi Two Balashi Three Balashi Four Five Balashi Six Balashi Seven Balashi More Eight Balashi Nine Balashi Ten Balashi Floor Cheers!